Am I Crazy?

Am I crazy?  Don’t the readings of today sound exactly like Sunday’s first reading and yesterday’s Gospel?!

Yuppers, they are those same readings.  Why?  It is important for us during this Octave of Easter to understand how the early church operated.  Each person was seen as important.  Age didn’t matter. Sex didn’t matter.  What mattered was that you believed.

The community was home, was a refuge, was the safety net, was support, was love.

All the things the early church saw as an example of heaven.

When I worked for the Diocese of Lansing, I felt like I had reached a bucket list goal.  I always wanted to work at a Catholic”office”.  I loved the idea that we were all of the same faith.  It was fun to able to go to Mass with colleagues.  I felt warm and fuzzy.

And that is probably how all the very early church felt: warm and fuzzy.

They were in it all together.  They understood the challenges of being these new Christians, and they were eager to be supportive of each other.  They were eager to live as Jesus taught.

So, how does all of this relate to motherhood, to now?

Well, like most utopian society it is hard to maintain once the group gets bigger and more voices of “authority” want to be heard.  Society kinda takes over.

Society takes us over, as moms, as well.  I get so frustrated with the ebb and flow of mothering competition.  With working moms vs. stay at home moms.  I remember fights, verbal fist to cuffs, with mom “friends” who felt it was important to let me know how right and perfect their children were.  It didn’t help either me or them.  It caused bitterness.  So, if that is happening to you new mom; get better nonjudgmental friends.

A true supportive, nonjudgmental friend will not make you feel like you are their psychological experiment of the week.  They will speak truth to you if you need it, gently.  Just as Jesus never nagged neither will they.  They will understand that each of us will be called to mother uniquely according to God’s plan for us.

God in His wisdom has created us to express different aspects of His Kingdom.  I consider myself an Orthodox Irish, (Christ new agey) Preppy Southern DC Catholic; I know a mouth fill.  I have mom friends who identify themselves as Earth Mothers.  Moms who will call themselves Flighty Artistic types.  Some say they are Type A moms.

Now in a utopian society like the early church tried to create, uniformity is key to its ultimate success; well, nature hates conformity.

The next thing that frustrates me: Unwillingness to accept differences.  God did not use a cookie cutter when He created us.  It must be very important to Him that there be diversity.  So, that must mean as long as we are mortal, good, non-abusive, legal, faithful to God and Church teaching; we should be able to raise our families according to our conscience and God’s call.

It always hurts me to hear Moms gossip about other moms.  Scripture tells us if we are having problems we should go to our sister and discuss it.  Discuss it, not bully or force imposed compliance but discuss it to find mutual beneficial opportunities.  What I found is this rarely happens.  Friendships end bitterly.  But if that is true, then how supportive and faithful was that friend?

Moms, these readings are important to us because they show us how important it is that we create a community  that is home, is refuge, is the safety net, is support, is love; than our friendships be an example of heaven.

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Is a spiritual director working helping moms find God in the everyday. She has been a spiritual director since 1998: worked as a Director of Religious Education for Holy Cross Parish(2000-2005), was Director of Project Rachel, a healing ministry for Post Abortive women(1999-2000). Patty worked a social worker for Catholic Social Services (1988 - 1995) Then studied for spiritual direction at the Dominican Center of Religious Studies, DeWitt Michigan

She is married 20 years and has four children

She has a BS/BA in social work from Aquinas College, CSD Certified Spiritual Director

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