No excuses

No Excess

Perhaps too much of everything is as bad as too little.” – Edna Ferber

Love this Daily Post question, and it all comes down to discernment.  I work with moms as a spiritual director, read here to learn more about what I do, but I digress; saying/blogging too much is messy when it is done out of fear.  There are many types of fear, let’s look at the two I have encountered most in my life: neediness and superiority.

When someone is blogging or explaining too much they are like a drowning person desperately splashing about trying to save themselves.  They have a great need to be heard, to be  taken seriously, so they overdo thinking that to bombard someone with words and thoughts will force that person to take them seriously.  Often the opposite happens, the talker/blogger says too much and it overwhelms or repulses the listener/reader leaving them with emotions and feelings they have just been given that are not theirs but still must be dealt with, almost like someone handing you the trash to take out; that is what the needy sharer is dong hoping you can take the emotional trash out for them because it is too difficult for them to do it.

Superiority may not look like fear but when someone just has to over explain or blog/speaks to you like you are an idiot being blessed by the profuse use of words, then you are reading/hearing from a fearful superior.  Like the needy blogger/speaker they have a desperate need to be heard and taken seriously, but the difference here is that unlike the needy sharer who feels you won’t take what s/he has to say seriously, the superior sharer feels s/he is imparting knowledge you couldn’t possible know, even when you explain that you do know/understand. They blatantly ignore you thinking they know best what you need, while the needy sharer is horrified that s/he told you something you already knew and can’t stop apologizing to you.

Think of Sheldon when you think of a superior sharer/blogger.  Think of Monica from the old Friends series for a needy sharer/blogger.

 

Is a spiritual director working helping moms find God in the everyday. She has been a spiritual director since 1998: worked as a Director of Religious Education for Holy Cross Parish(2000-2005), was Director of Project Rachel, a healing ministry for Post Abortive women(1999-2000). Patty worked a social worker for Catholic Social Services (1988 – 1995) Then studied for spiritual direction at the Dominican Center of Religious Studies, DeWitt Michigan

She is married 20 years and has four children

She has a BS/BA in social work from Aquinas College, CSD Certified Spiritual Director

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