Is it really your issh, or are you just conditioned to do it

Talking with our second son he said something we all know that at a certain age we become our parents, we say things that our parents say, and do things the way our parents did them.

That is also a key concept in this morning Gospel: Become the change!  It ain’t easy but the reward!  OMG the reward not only for you but for everyone around you!  Once you make that prayer of Lord help me change, Jesus’ response is are you sure you know what you are asking?  Because he will do it, really you and he together will do.

I have traits of my mom that I don’t like:  I am always seeking reassurance from others and sometimes i will ask at the most inappropriate times if I am alright making the focus off them and onto me.  I am first they are last.  But when I conscientiously think about what is going on, create a plan on how I will help, what I will say, I am last and they are first.  I can clearly what needs to happen and how things need to change, or what resources need to be gathered and used.  If you stay in fear you become ineffective as a parent.

My mom had a way of wanting people to only be what she wanted them to be; lording over others forcing them to do what she wanted.  Sometimes I do that.  I am not recognizing my children’s uniqueness and needs.  It’s all about me when it should be about them.  When I take myself out of the fear of others judgement I can clearly see my children for who they are.   This is difficult if a child is very close to you in personality or the personality that you felt inferior to, then it is important to step back and realize that you are the authority.  Sometimes we let our guard down and we become that little child again, when we really are capable grown mothers.  It can happen in a split second when someone says something that brings us back to the past or we just are feeling insecure.  What we must do is step back compose ourselves and return.

The baptism with which I am baptized, you will be baptized.  At our baptism we became Priest, Prophet and Queen; what that means for us is that we have the greatest resource: God; but also that we seek out ways to improve our lives, help our children and love more richly.

 

Is a spiritual director working helping moms find God in the everyday. She has been a spiritual director since 1998: worked as a Director of Religious Education for Holy Cross Parish(2000-2005), was Director of Project Rachel, a healing ministry for Post Abortive women(1999-2000). Patty worked a social worker for Catholic Social Services (1988 - 1995) Then studied for spiritual direction at the Dominican Center of Religious Studies, DeWitt Michigan

She is married 20 years and has four children

She has a BS/BA in social work from Aquinas College, CSD Certified Spiritual Director

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